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Every WNBA team, ranked by the altitude of its nickname

By Russell Steinberg

LOS ANGELES, CA - SEPTMEBER 13: The Los Angeles Sparks mascot entertains the crowd during the game against the Phoenix Mercury on September 13, 2016 at STAPLES Center in Los Angeles, California. NOTE TO USER: User expressly acknowledges and agrees that, by downloading and/or using this Photograph, user is consenting to the terms and conditions of the Getty Images License Agreement. Mandatory Copyright Notice: Copyright 2016 NBAE (Photo by Adam Pantozzi/NBAE via Getty Images)
LOS ANGELES, CA - SEPTMEBER 13: The Los Angeles Sparks mascot entertains the crowd during the game against the Phoenix Mercury on September 13, 2016 at STAPLES Center in Los Angeles, California. NOTE TO USER: User expressly acknowledges and agrees that, by downloading and/or using this Photograph, user is consenting to the terms and conditions of the Getty Images License Agreement. Mandatory Copyright Notice: Copyright 2016 NBAE (Photo by Adam Pantozzi/NBAE via Getty Images) /
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ATLANTA, GA – JUNE 17: The Atlanta Dream mascot before the game between the Chicago Sky and Atlanta Dream on June 17, 2016 at Philips Arena in Atlanta, Georgia. NOTE TO USER: User expressly acknowledges and agrees that, by downloading and/or using this Photograph, user is consenting to the terms and conditions of the Getty Images License Agreement. Mandatory Copyright Notice: Copyright 2016 NBAE (Photo by Scott Cunningham/NBAE via Getty Images)
ATLANTA, GA – JUNE 17: The Atlanta Dream mascot before the game between the Chicago Sky and Atlanta Dream on June 17, 2016 at Philips Arena in Atlanta, Georgia. NOTE TO USER: User expressly acknowledges and agrees that, by downloading and/or using this Photograph, user is consenting to the terms and conditions of the Getty Images License Agreement. Mandatory Copyright Notice: Copyright 2016 NBAE (Photo by Scott Cunningham/NBAE via Getty Images) /

12. Atlanta Dream (2 feet, 9 inches)

Dreams also take place in the brain, so it would stand to reason that the Atlanta Dream’s altitude would be roughly equivalent to that of the Fever’s. But that does not consider what the human is doing while each occurs. While it may be smart for a person with a fever to lay in bed and rest, we know this is not always the case. Even following the doctor’s orders, you still have to get up to go to the bathroom, get food, brush your teeth, and do any number of other household activities while you’re home sick. You may spend much of you fever time in bed, but not all of it. While dreaming, you are almost exclusively lying down. Don’t try to tell me you can sleep and dream standing up. You don’t do that. I know it and you know it. Now the question is where you are lying down while you sleep. If you’re in bed, the bed and mattress together are probably a little more than two feet off the floor. Factor in the elevation of your head on a pillow and the diameter of your head itself, and I guessed 2 feet, 9 inches. You can argue several inches in either direction, but it is still far behind standing fever height, putting the Atlanta Dream dead last on our list.

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