‘We can change the world’: Talking race as an NCAA basketball coach in 2017
“I hope what I’m saying doesn’t alienate anyone,” Gottlieb said. “I just think as coaches in this day and age that you can’t put your head in the sand and say ‘I only coach basketball’. I just want them to feel that they have an adult figure and a coach that cares for them more than in just basketball. To not be tapped into how they may be feeling, I think is negligent.”
Hendrix echoed this, admitting that the conversations aren’t always fun, but nevertheless are important.
“I am blessed with a very intelligent and articulate group,” Hendrix said. “Sometimes we leave those meetings feeling able and encouraged; sometimes we leave sad. But all in all, sadness still acts as motivation. They are mature enough to realize they don’t have to think alike and still love each other. Everyone’s scope is relative… everyone could frame themselves as the victim or the victor. I take pride in instilling hope and faith, regardless of the demographics that make you, you.
“I wish I believed every women’s college basketball team could do the same. I do believe that if we, as coaches, continue to avoid issues and choose not to be vulnerable, then we aren’t preparing our kids for life outside of our bubble. They’re hearing things and feeling things on every side of their every day. I’d rather they sort through their emotions with people who truly care for them. I try to do my small part in forcing acknowledgment and by trying to teach them how to navigate it all.”
Gottlieb, whose father was a civil court judge in New York City for two decades and drove down to hear the now famous “I Have a Dream” speech from Martin Luther King Jr., simply approaches it all because that is who she is, not because of who she loves.
“When I first started to coach this Cal team and love them as human beings and see what they go through sometimes, it made me feel more like, ‘Wow’. This isn’t an esoteric, far-off concept; these are people I love having to be scared when they walk around.
“Of course it’s more personal when it comes to your own flesh and blood, but I think it’s a good kind of test because isn’t that how we are supposed to feel about everybody? Aren’t you supposed to love your neighbor and brother the same? So while me having a fiancé and a son, sure it’s more personal, but it’s also a reminder that you’re supposed to care that much about your neighbor and I try to always see it in that context.”